Fear of rejection and fear of conflict

• Card 1

  Fear of rejection can sound like

  • "If I disagree, they might not like me anymore."
  • "If I say no, they'll find someone easier to be around."
  • "My value depends on being useful or agreeable."

• Card 2

  Fear of conflict can sound like

  • "Any disagreement could turn into something much bigger."
  • "It's safer to just go along with it."
  • "I'd rather feel resentful than deal with tension."

• Card 3

  Both fears are usually rooted in real past experience, even when the current relationship or situation is genuinely safer. Recognising the fear as old, rather than untrue, can be a useful first step.

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