The fawn response

• Card 1

  Fawn is a response that tries to prevent threat by keeping others calm, happy or comfortable — often at the cost of your own needs. It's sometimes the least talked-about of the four, but for many people, especially those who grew up needing to manage a parent's or caregiver's mood, it can be the most familiar.

• Card 2

  This can look like

  • Agreeing quickly, even when you don't actually agree
  • Apologising often, sometimes for things that aren't your fault
  • Difficulty saying no, or feeling guilty when you do
  • Scanning others' moods closely and adjusting yourself to match
  • Feeling responsible for other people's feelings or reactions

  "If I keep everyone else okay, I'll be safe."

  Our People-Pleasing guide explores the fawn response in much more depth, including where it can come from and how to gently build boundaries.

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