Learn5 min
Coercive control
A pattern of rules, monitoring and consequences that shrinks your freedom.
1 of 3
Swipe left or right to move between cards
Coercive control describes an ongoing pattern of behaviour designed to make another person dependent, compliant and frightened of the consequences of stepping out of line. Individually the incidents can look small; together they form a system of rules you live inside. In England and Wales, coercive or controlling behaviour in an intimate or family relationship is a criminal offence.
What it can look like
- Rules about what you wear, eat, spend, watch or say
- Needing permission, or facing punishment for ordinary choices
- Being checked up on, timed, or asked to account for every hour
- Threats about children, pets, immigration status, money or reputation
- Consequences that are never openly stated but always understood
Not sure about some behaviours in your relationship? A short, private reflection tool can help you put words to what you notice.
Take the Relationship Safety Check →