Practice8 min
Planning ahead for anniversaries and hard dates
A gentle way to prepare for dates that tend to bring grief forward.
You don't need to avoid or “push through” hard dates. Planning ahead — even loosely — can make them feel more manageable, without pretending they aren't difficult.
Planning for a difficult date
- 1Name the date and what it meansBe specific — what does this date mark for you?
- 2Decide how much you want to mark itQuietly alone, with others, with a ritual, or not at all — all are valid.
- 3Lower other demands on that day if possibleFewer obligations, more flexibility.
- 4Plan one comforting thingSomething familiar, soothing or meaningful, even if small.
- 5Arrange supportLet someone know the date matters, in case you want company or a check-in.
- 6Have an aftercare planGrief can land unexpectedly the next day too — be gentle with yourself either way.
You might explore these in your own words — there is no right answer, and stopping partway is completely fine.