The inner critic and shame

• Card 1

  Shame is the feeling that something is wrong with you as a person, rather than with something you did. A harsh inner critic often speaks in exactly that language — “you're stupid”, “you're too much”, “you're unlovable” — rather than commenting on a specific action.

• Card 2

  How the cycle can look

  • A mistake or setback happens
  • The inner critic responds with global, personal attacks
  • Shame intensifies, making the critic feel even more “true”
  • Withdrawal, over-apologising or self-punishment can follow
  • The pattern repeats next time something goes wrong

• Card 3

  Because shame and self-criticism are so closely linked, it can help to explore this module alongside our dedicated Shame-Based Trauma guide, which looks in more depth at where shame comes from and how to work with it.

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